#YourStoryMatters , E4 | Single and Serving by Melina Gonzalez

9.11.2015

AUTHOR: MELINA GONZALEZ



What does the bible say about being single? And how are we to understand this unique design by God for some of us? We are aware that God has designed the relationship of marriage to be the most common expression of human life in an intimate, social way. The bible says "But if they can’t control themselves, they should go ahead and marry. It’s better to marry than to burn with lust." (1 Corinthians 7:9 NLT) This was said by Paul the apostle which implies that we can be single if we want to be BUT if we are going to fall in sin, we should do the right thing by getting married.

            I want to share an experience of mine with you but before I get to it, I will introduce myself. My name is Melina and I am 24 years old. I grew up in a happy household where my family and I attended church regularly. I don't know what life is outside of Christ and I don't want to. Since my father gave his life to Christ, he gained so much knowledge and wisdom over the years, something that probably would not have been possible if he didn't turn his life around. I am grateful for that knowledge. He raised three daughters which I know was difficult especially in our teenage years. My sisters and I have had endless advice from both of my parents but the most advice we received from our dad was about boys and relationships.




            Most people who know me still want to know why at this day and age I haven't settled down with a man. They say I'm very pretty and it would not be hard for me to find someone. Truth be told, I would settle. But Jesus did not die for my sins only to have me marry someone that participates in the sins I'm trying to stay delivered from. I want to wait for the man that God has for me and not rush into anything superficial.

            I once dated a guy when I was finishing off high school. He was already in college at the time and I was shy of my 18th birthday. We shared the same beliefs and his mother attended the church I used to go to. He lived an hour and a half away from home, worked and had school so I only saw him on weekends. Before we commenced our relationship, he came over and sat with my parents to let them know we were officially and exclusively dating. Our relationship went great, he was my best friend. He was there when a very close friend of mine passed away, through other moments of loss, I knew I  could count on him.

            One day, after several of months of dating, a wonderful woman of God whom is also an evangelist, came over to my house. We were having a special event at church and my parents invited her and her husband to dinner prior to the service. Before we were on our way, she had a word for me. She prayed over me right in my living room and told me that God has greater things coming and to wait on my partner for he had not yet arrived! Imagine how I felt upon hearing those words! I admit  I was a little sad but grateful for such revelation. That night I started second guessing my relationship and called my boyfriend to tell him all about it. His response was "Let's just keep praying." And so we did. After a few months more, we started drifting apart. He was not coming to town as much and we starting fighting over little things. Eventually we decided to end things in a civil way.

            My reason for sharing this with you is because I learned something so valuable. I learned that not everything that seems almost perfect is meant for me. I learned from then on to wait on God and his promises. I have met great people along the way but something we all must know is just because someone is a man/woman of God, doesn't mean that person is automatically meant for you. I read somewhere "Instead of trying to find your soul mate, single Christians should focus on loving others, and then prayfully consider tying the knot later." I hold on to this statement and I encourage you to do the same.

            I'm a single adult and I sit and sometimes think of the perks of being single. One of them being, you have time. You are able to spend more time on hobbies, friends, among other things. Your attention is undivided so you can be more available and more useful at places like church. Another is that I think being single has allowed me to develop more of who I am. I feel like I have had time and space to figure out what I think about certain topics all on my own, what I value most, and who I am and want to be. Just as there are perks, there may be downfalls. Some days you may really want to share something with someone. Maybe you come home from church or socializing, maybe reading a great book and want someone else to talk about it with. Someone who cares about (most of) the same things you do. Someone who cares about your ideas and has ideas of their own. Sooner or later, You will experience that and more if you are patient.

            So I encourage you to not get ahead of yourself! What God gives, He gives it good! Isaiah 43:4 says "You are precious and honored in my sight." Don't be discouraged and never forget God's unique plan for your life! We will have temptations along the way because we are human and our flesh is weak. But my advice to you is to be still. Be patient. Don't take three steps forward only to fall three steps back. We all want to be loved and to love. Some days you might feel lonely but just turn to God and His word and remember that those moments are fleeting. God is saving you for someone special! I leave you with an uplifting verse, one of my favorites.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." (Jeremiah 29:11 NIV)
                                                                        
                                                       With love, Your sister in Christ,
                                                                                                       Mel      

No comments:

Post a Comment

CopyRight © | Theme Designed By Hello Manhattan